So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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