His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
