Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
So I just went to clothing optional bar
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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