I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize