It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
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