Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
