i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
