What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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