Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
