Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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