I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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