Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize