i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
