i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I touched a dick in church today
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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