Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize