GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
