just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
