we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
