Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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