He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
