I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
