we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
