Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
