kristin has been a bad kristin
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize