He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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