I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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