i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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