dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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