I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
