So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Also, beer. Big fan.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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