so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
either way he was missing a nipple.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize