google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize