i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize