I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
