I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
