quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
