He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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