I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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