I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
