And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
