How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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