literally had 100 drinks last night.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
