I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
