I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
