do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
