when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It all started with a game of naked twister.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
