i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
