so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
