Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
