So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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