OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
