Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Still dying that you shit outside
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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